Articles, Blog

AGGRESSIVE POSITIVITY | Boxing Surgery Simulator

September 8, 2019


*Wapish* Top of the morning to ya laddies, my name is Jacksepticeye and welcome to boxing surgery simulator. So I’ve played a surgery simulator before, this is not that. This is like a little indie game that people have made and I even like down at the bottom it says that the brogramming was done by Scott Meyer and Michael Wilson and art-making by James Lloyd I don’t wanna leave James Lloyd out He did a lot of stuff on this. Look at all the art making he did So I don’t really know what this is It kind of reminds me of Rock’em Sock’em robots and some of the screens showed stuff when guys were all bloody I don’t know what I’m doing. Uhm A Ponywolf Spectacular. Fredrick the Auspicious versus Sean the Beneficial I’m Seán That’s me. I’m fighting. Let’s do this Okay. Oh god. Punch? Am I able to punch? What is happening? Oooh I have to hit the things. Alright, I have a sore tooth. Can I? Tooth. Okay-oh I’m hurting my guy. I don’t wanna hurt my guy. Band-aid. A band-aid on the thing. What? What-what do I do? Oh shit. Okay. Open your good eye. No, no, no. What are these doing? Are these helping me? okay. Apparently I’m supposed to click these. I have no idea what’s happening. Uhm, I’ve sore teeth, I’ve blisters. Can I cut open the blisters? Get out there-oh shit. No! I’ve-what the fuck is this game? What are the controls? Am I supposed to be clicking these things? Oh lollipop. Of course I use the lollipop on these. Do use that on the ears? I don’t know what I -glue. Glue the teeth. I broke the game. Game crashed. Game’s ah fuck Okay. Fight! Fight! I’m-I’m gonna die. I’m done. I’m done-zo. Okay. Wham. I’m out. *laughs* Oh my god. Sean the Beneficial died of broken nose. What are the controls? I have no idea what I’m doing. Wha-who’s fightin’ now? *announcer voice* As Relevant as Ever! Dustin the Equalizer vs. Lance the Cow All right, pow. Open your good eye. Defense defense. You are terrible. Looking good. Why you box so bad? You smell weird. Make a meal out of him. Am I supposed to be doing those things? Uhm-ice cream? No. Nothing worked, And my dude is gonna die. Ew I have to hook the blood? Gross. What can I use on-pffft. Fuckin fly in my room. Okay. Get out there. Let’s see what happens. Punch punch. Punch punch. You got this! Looking good! Do gooder? I dunno hit him? Use squirrel-You’re like a son to me. Smash and dash! Ah, I’m kinda getting it. No! No! I clicked the ice cream. Aah, fill his ear full of cotton. Okay, here we go. I’m still alive. Make a meal out of him. You smell weird. I love you! Now, now, now! Get him. Uh-You’re like a son to me. You’re a bu-I love you! That gets my health to go back up. Telling someone you love them gets their health to go back up. I love this game. It’s so cute Glue? Glue doesn’t work on the teeth. The teeth? The teeth did work on the teeth, it’s just weird. I don’t know what works on the humps and bumps on my head though. All right. Let’s get in there. Your got this. You’re so pretty. you should have dodged. Open your good eye. Crap. Make a meal out of him. Punch him, you got this. You call that a punch? You smell weird. I’m being very nasty to my guy. Okay, fix your tooth. No. Glue? No Scalpel? What works on these? Band-aid? The band-aid works! Okay. I got this. You got this! Use squirrel style kung-fu. Make a meal out of him. Way to go-hit him. Try punching-do a barrel roll. Take a breath. My guy is surviving the dredges right now. What? It says it’s doing it and not doing it at the same time. It was literally doing the *imitates squishing noise* sound and then it was also ugh. Lance the cow died of a broken heart. Lance the Cow *fake crying* That’s so sad. Okay. I know I said it before. But let’s do this. Now, I know what I’m doing. As Relevant as Ever, Michael the Disastrous versus Lance the Spider. *imitating Hulk Hogan* I got you for three rounds. Uh-Defense defense. You smell weird. You smell weird. You’re a bum. No. These are all-way to hit him You should have dodged-these are all bad things to be telling him. Okay, ice cream goes on the owies. There we go. The hook goes on that, nice. And then the band-aid goes on *blows raspberry* I fixed him! Except your eye, your eye’s are bloody. Are you okay? Alright, come out there my son. Looking good. You’re terrible. Way to hit him. Now, now, now! No, no, no. Smash and dash. Why do you box so bad? Do a barrel roll! Six to four, I did really good that time. Should send me back in coach. What fixes your eye? I don’t know how to fix your eye. what fixes your-glue? No. Oh, I don’t know the scalpels for yet. Okay, punch punch. Do a barrel roll. Try punching! You should have dodged-open your good eye. My guy isn’t even hurt. I mean, he’s kind of look a little like *imitates Sylvester Stallone* Adrienne! But you’re doing good fella, you’re doing amazing, sweetie. Ah, scalpel on the eye. Get rid of those eyelids. You don’t need them, keeping the eyes open. There we go. Why do you box so bad-no. Do barrel roll. You’re like a son to me! Smash and dash. You’re terrible? Do-gooder-er? Use squirrel style kung-fu! Hit him! Aw, I didn’t do – I didn’t do too good that round, but the r in Jesus was not with me. A beautiful bouncing baby boy ready to go out and beat the shit out of another boy. Sh-you should have dodged. Way to hit him. You should have do-ah crap. That’s crap. That’s bad. Oh, but you’re good at-shit that’s bad as well. Now, now, now, hit him. Oh 5 to 9. I thought Dolly Parton talked about 9 to 5. Uhm, what else you got? Is that it? Are you good? Uh, glue? Oh no, band-aid, band-aid. Yes I got a little health back. Round 6, why is this guy dying? Use squirrel style kung-fu. Defense defense. You should have dodged. Looking good. Oh no, I’m doing very, very badly. Why am I not winning coach? Coach, when will my team win the all-star cup? Coach, send me back in coach? I’m ready coach send me back in. I’m gonna fight him. Smash and dash. Block, why don’t ya? Shit. Now, now, now! Get up! Try punching! Looking good! Fu-I did real good that time. He took a monstrous beating. Okay, sometime- Something works in these stars. The glu-oh it’s all frozen, no. Give me back my boy. The glue works on the stars. I didn’t realize, I thought that that was just a state of being. Defense defense. No, not you’re a terrible, I want to say you’re looking good. Make a meal out of him now. Okay, okay glue. Glues for youse. Glues for the stuff that you going throughs. We got this team. We got this team We’re gonna help this man. Looking good. I don’t know if opening up your good eye is it? Lance the Spider, Cool story bro. Do I always have to lose? Is that a thing? That’s just inevitable that I have to lose? Cause my boys are not doing too good, I’ll tell ya. Get back in there. It’s time, a Mutated Software Joint. Don’t ask. Barry the Cataclysmic versus Mattie the Desolating. I want Matt the Earth Destroyer. Defense defense defense. Now now now! Take a breath, take a breath. No, no, no. Now now now! Yeah looking good. Oh my god, he’s a fuckin beast. Now I-I know exactly what each of the things do. Now I know how to fix up my boy. Look at you, looking good, son! Okay, round two. Take a breath. Okay. You’re so pretty, take a breath! Try punching. No, you’re so pretty. Make a meal out of him! Okay, at least my guy he knows that he’s so pretty. That’s exactly what your boxing son needs to know. When he’s going out there, and he’s fighting for a king and country, he needs to know that he’s pretty. Okay, get out there. Here we go. Here we go. Fight him, fight him. Defense defense. Get-looking good. Okay, you should have dodged, but open up your good eye. Now now now! You’re like a son to me, defense. Okay, I get really into it, okay. When I see my boy up there, that’s my boy. That’s my son. When I see him out there, and he’s fighting and he’s doing the business. I just can’t help but feel like I’m getting involved That’s me out there. I’m wearing my heart on my sleeve! Do a barrel roll! I love you like a son. You’re like a father to me. But you’re doing great, sweetie. You got this, looking good. Now your fucking back up to full. You’re back up to full, way to hit him! Yes, 16 to 7 on that one. I might actually get arrested for murder at the end of all this. All I got a few, like blisters on me. Okay, the game keeps freezing. You’re like a son to me. Take a breath. *laughs* I’d love to consider him saying these out loud. You’re like a son to me. Take a breath, looking good. Do it son. Okay There’s a lot to fix-I’m not gonna have enough time. I’m not gonna have enough time. Oh, nailed it. I’m only at half health though. Oh my god. Oh my god, I’m not getting good ones. Now now now! This game is bullsh- Okay, so that was the desktop version of the game. Apparently there is a browser version of the game, that is more frequently updated? I don’t know. They said that the desktop version might not get updated. So, let’s see if the browser version is any different. Dustin the Expedient versus Sean the Fatal. Let’s *imitating wrestling announcer* let’s get ready to rumble Okay, let’s tumble in the jungle. I’m playing as Sean now. There’s only-you’re so pretty. Defense defense. Smash and dash. Uh, uh- squirrel style kung-fu. Okay, this version is actually way fucking slower to play. But. What? Wh-oh that was fast. Okay, okay. Try punching. Why do you box so bad? You shoulda do- you got this! You’re like a son to me! Okay, that was bad. What do I need? This. Are you fucking serious with that time? The time goes down so quick. Make a meal out of him-use squirrel style kung-fu-looking good-do a barrel roll. It seems to go down really fast at the end, Open your good eye- try punching-use squirrel style kung-fu. You got this, I love you! You’re like a son to me! Okay, I won that round. This is way faster. What’s happening? Are you serious with the speed of these rounds? No! No, I was ticking the ear! You’re like a son to me! Oh dicks! Sean the Fatal. Died of hurt feelings. That’s way too relatable. That’s way too relatable-not cool game. Okay. Well that does it for this video on Boxing surgery simulator. I feel like I yelled all the encouragement in the world that a good dad should. I was-I was there. I was tell him he was a son to me. I was tellin’ him that he looked good, he was pretty. I didn’t tell him he was terrible or smelled bad or smelled weird I told him that he was fantastic. And no amount of encouragement was helping him. So I don’t know what to do. As always, I will leave a link in the description for you guys to be able to go off and play this for yourselves. Tell me one of you won this. Tell me one of you has been able to win this. The browser version of the game is obnoxiously hard, I don’t know why. But anyway, thank you guys so much for boxing this video with me. If you liked it punch that like button in the face LIKE A BOSS! And high punches all around PAPOOSH PAPOOSH. But thank you guys. And I will see all you dudes, in the next video A lot of punch analogies there at the end, really feeling good.

100 Comments

  • Reply Abd Alnablse June 4, 2018 at 7:51 am

    Jack when you said that there is a fly in your room a fly came to my room in the same second

  • Reply 1deathseeker June 4, 2018 at 9:36 am

    How dare you give me Amos Diggory sads in the morning.

  • Reply HeyIm Ash June 4, 2018 at 10:33 am

    Is tack means thank you in irish

  • Reply Jemcy Mae June 4, 2018 at 10:44 am

    Im expecting youre going to shout BOY😂

  • Reply IAmTheJosh June 4, 2018 at 11:04 am

    That's MY!!! BOI

  • Reply anthony nnn June 4, 2018 at 12:01 pm

    ur momma gay

  • Reply rose legend June 4, 2018 at 12:05 pm

    your doing great sweetie
    hilarious lol

  • Reply BaileyRaptor June 4, 2018 at 2:23 pm

    Clarence the fly makes another appearance. 🙂

  • Reply Mr Llama32987 June 4, 2018 at 3:20 pm

    I know Vern Troyer died ages ago but R.I.P Vern Troyer

  • Reply Tanya Kellus June 4, 2018 at 6:34 pm

    Get green hair again

  • Reply ツa p o i June 4, 2018 at 7:26 pm

    I only got the notification today.🙁

  • Reply blaze and frost gamer June 4, 2018 at 7:29 pm

    I NEVER get noticed =(

  • Reply RedReaper 360 June 4, 2018 at 7:53 pm

    Where IS RAFT!!!!!!😕

  • Reply Neintendew June 4, 2018 at 8:47 pm

    Many here are leaving info of their lives that no one HERE cares to know about.

  • Reply Dragon June 4, 2018 at 8:53 pm

    Jack: He's lookin kinda like Aaadriiaaane

    Me: name is Adriane

    Me: OH MY GOD I'M SO SPECIAL

  • Reply Twodragonz June 4, 2018 at 9:52 pm

    Are you going to do a drum cover soon?

  • Reply OMG I’m Blurry June 4, 2018 at 9:53 pm

    Somehow I really don’t think a bandaid would do anything lol

  • Reply Chris Albright June 4, 2018 at 10:09 pm

    @ 534 Rocky, You gotta cut me Mick

  • Reply Dustin Born June 4, 2018 at 10:11 pm

    its so weird when your name is in a video game and you hear jack say your name. oddly satisfying

  • Reply Frederick Scher June 4, 2018 at 11:02 pm

    And i’m Frederick.

  • Reply thnotsointelligent June 4, 2018 at 11:08 pm

    Can someone please explain to me what he was doing wrong or how you win that game at all???

  • Reply A A June 5, 2018 at 12:36 am

    U gave up???

  • Reply Sad Ducks June 5, 2018 at 1:20 am

    spoiler I'm not gana spoil it

  • Reply Sad Ducks June 5, 2018 at 1:24 am

    he used freaking glue for teeth he didn't even put in

  • Reply Sad Ducks June 5, 2018 at 1:25 am

    lance the cow died of a broken heart

  • Reply Breanden June 5, 2018 at 1:42 am

    Jack I loved Mr. Diggory Reference!

  • Reply DG June 5, 2018 at 2:54 am

    Good fortnite vids on my channel

  • Reply Gabethesquid 123 June 5, 2018 at 5:39 am

    Ddddd duel

  • Reply Tia Marlens June 5, 2018 at 5:57 am

    Detroit : Become Human is waiting for you, Jack

  • Reply Donald June 5, 2018 at 6:51 am

    The hook works cause you sew up the spots on him. Sort of like getting stitches. 🙂 Hope to see some more gaming from you Jack.

  • Reply jag har autist June 5, 2018 at 7:45 am

    Play detroit become human

  • Reply Blast Tony June 5, 2018 at 3:24 pm

    I sent you a friend request on FaceBook plz see to it

  • Reply XD gamer June 5, 2018 at 5:33 pm

    That was horrible

  • Reply Martin Black June 5, 2018 at 9:17 pm

    When the vid started my ears started to ring

  • Reply Deadly Wolf June 5, 2018 at 11:28 pm

    He must be using Sprint because a magazine says it’s the fastest

  • Reply Dark sniper June 5, 2018 at 11:43 pm

    Can you play flip house again pleas

  • Reply Landon Carson June 6, 2018 at 12:45 am

    Make some more GTA vids with moon gravity and sticky bombs

  • Reply Heather Crapson June 6, 2018 at 2:29 am

    He's jacksepticeye u single

  • Reply Jacob Russell Vlogs June 6, 2018 at 3:17 am

    I want anti

  • Reply christopher Boudreaux June 6, 2018 at 3:51 am

    Made popcorn at just the right time

  • Reply Shadow Vertigo June 6, 2018 at 8:21 am

    Jack: *Sean "Hey it's me!"
    Me: "Hey its also me!–Three times!"

    If you don't mind Jack. From now on I am going to introduce myself either as Sean The Fatal (or as Lance The Spider if you want to use the first one).

  • Reply Nate B June 6, 2018 at 8:38 am

    i got the spiderman reference

  • Reply BandNerdsUnite June 6, 2018 at 9:05 am

    I just got a bit triggered when I saw the pointer was a razor blade..

  • Reply Shawn Animates June 6, 2018 at 10:23 am

    holy s*** that game is so freaking brutal # Septiceye

  • Reply Can of Pringles June 6, 2018 at 1:59 pm

    Jack you are AWSOME

  • Reply Babygirltashx June 6, 2018 at 2:30 pm

    YOU CLICK ON THE POSITIVE STUFF

  • Reply Younes Melzz June 6, 2018 at 3:00 pm

    I fucken miss watching cause I used to watch u when u had 1 mill then I started wat hung other utbuers then came back to watching and here u are with 19mill subs

  • Reply Soulbarrier June 6, 2018 at 10:57 pm

    I played this game and manged to reach round 12 only once while recording, this game is really hard.

  • Reply kOaLa sHoRe June 6, 2018 at 11:14 pm

    jack why can't you play boldis bacics

  • Reply anime wolf June 6, 2018 at 11:47 pm

    Vs lancer the spider man

  • Reply Jamal Godelia June 7, 2018 at 12:30 am

    Play the desktop version of the game more

  • Reply eric mcclain June 7, 2018 at 12:42 am

    Jack you would be a great dad

  • Reply Samantha Smith June 7, 2018 at 3:05 am

    i am sorry to say this but Sean the Beneficial has passed away due to broken nose.

  • Reply Jeff from Team 6 June 7, 2018 at 12:13 pm

    Hi

  • Reply Conrad Powell June 7, 2018 at 1:43 pm

    Is jacksepticeye my favorite YouTuber DanTDM

  • Reply Franxine Cordero June 7, 2018 at 2:27 pm

    Play risk factions

  • Reply Undertale Sans June 7, 2018 at 6:32 pm

    Cool

  • Reply Romeo 2002 June 7, 2018 at 8:17 pm

    Don’t like to correct you jack but in Spider-Man he said “I got you for 3 minutes.”

  • Reply madison June 7, 2018 at 8:22 pm

    I never knew I would get so over excited when Jack said my name 😂

  • Reply PrestoCharge 2007 June 7, 2018 at 9:13 pm

    Your a dumbass you have to click the helpful talk what the fuck

  • Reply DA VIL June 8, 2018 at 3:56 am

    Jack you are da best thanks for making this chanel

  • Reply Truxton Glahe June 8, 2018 at 6:28 am

    For somebody who plays games for a living, he is absolutely awful at them

  • Reply Girl InaHat June 8, 2018 at 11:28 am

    Yes lets put a sharp object near the EYE???

  • Reply Nugget Don’t_eat_the_nugget June 8, 2018 at 11:42 am

    No it’s not cute lol

  • Reply xxScootz June 8, 2018 at 2:36 pm

    I like how you just smash a new tooth into the spot where a tooth already was

  • Reply 바마TV June 8, 2018 at 3:32 pm

    good!!!

  • Reply Lil Drumer boy June 8, 2018 at 3:40 pm

    Please do more drumming videos

  • Reply TyRees Foust June 8, 2018 at 4:46 pm

    Jack please play Titanfall 2

  • Reply Can we get 100,000 subscribers? June 8, 2018 at 9:50 pm

    Watch papa can you hear me By Endigo

  • Reply cring all dayzzz June 8, 2018 at 11:04 pm

    you r good at the game

  • Reply DC 4EVER June 8, 2018 at 11:13 pm

    These videos are my life 👍

  • Reply Gavin's friend June 9, 2018 at 9:13 am

    i got a one minute unskipable add… f you youtube

  • Reply nightmare eyes June 9, 2018 at 5:29 pm

    Retared

  • Reply nightmare eyes June 9, 2018 at 5:30 pm

    Idiot

  • Reply Vince Daisog June 10, 2018 at 1:59 am

    More

  • Reply k. j. June 10, 2018 at 2:14 am

    "im sean!" he's so adorable

  • Reply Watch and like June 10, 2018 at 3:31 am

    jack I think U can win just pay more attention to your name

  • Reply Me Gamer June 10, 2018 at 3:35 am

    Jack is cool but weak

  • Reply Watch and like June 10, 2018 at 3:39 am

    you can win Sean when the health in top left corner runs out you killed your opponent
    P.S. Pay attention to both names

  • Reply mark ryan hoylar June 10, 2018 at 11:41 am

    hi.

  • Reply alex miranda June 11, 2018 at 12:13 am

    best youtuber

  • Reply Bin Bag June 11, 2018 at 11:36 am

    BONESAW IS READY!

  • Reply Grace jungsHoOk June 13, 2018 at 3:46 pm

    When are we going to have : a way out again???I miss it!

  • Reply Maria Lee June 13, 2018 at 10:09 pm

    wow. that. was fast

  • Reply grigor hovhannisyan June 21, 2018 at 6:45 am

    Liiiiike

  • Reply lance copus June 21, 2018 at 3:17 pm

    Hehehehe💜💜 Lance

  • Reply Grant Walton June 21, 2018 at 10:56 pm

    Glue doesn’t work on the teeth. The Teeth?

  • Reply Cheddar The Shredder June 22, 2018 at 5:19 am

    Let's get ready for demonetization!

  • Reply Bruhv June 22, 2018 at 6:33 pm

    you call that a punch?, you smell weird ~ Jacksepticeye 2018

  • Reply Ike Almeda July 1, 2018 at 3:44 am

    RIP Lance the cow, died of broken heart

  • Reply Dead X Clancy July 1, 2018 at 5:48 pm

    Jack Septic Eye you are my favorite YouTube

  • Reply evilsledge006 playz July 5, 2018 at 11:08 pm

    Hi

  • Reply Roblox Phoenix Connection July 17, 2018 at 2:23 pm

    OOF

  • Reply Radvilė Šimkutė August 27, 2018 at 11:17 am

    is this game a referance to old woodpecker u know the episode with the wrestlinh

  • Reply Denise Figueroa October 16, 2018 at 6:03 am

    💚12:50 funny

  • Reply Ruby Rose October 29, 2018 at 7:36 pm

    I learned a lot of things from the Rocky franchise. When his eye is swollen shut, use the razor blade.

  • Reply Haley Hess November 10, 2018 at 3:56 am

    MY SCHOOL IS DOING THE MUSICAL 9 to 5!!!!!!!🤗❤️I love you Sean!!

  • Reply Shnitzer Weesle November 19, 2018 at 1:19 pm

    Thanks for playing this!!! I tried playing it but my computer was being a douche.

  • Reply Infestation December 21, 2018 at 3:38 pm

    Alright Dr. Jack. This man actually got his penis inverted in the ring… So good luck with that.

  • Reply ian hatton January 20, 2019 at 8:11 am

    I think u have to survive for as long as u can before u die💀

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